December is the darkest month by measurement and the brightest by tradition, and the gap between those two facts creates a peculiar kind of pressure. Here are five ideas for navigating it without losing your mind.
1. Give Yourself Permission to Not Enjoy Everything
The holidays carry an enormous emotional obligation — to feel festive, grateful, connected, and serene, often simultaneously, often in the company of complicated family situations and expensive expectations. You don’t have to feel all of it. Let yourself be where you actually are, rather than performing where you’re supposed to be.
2. Do One Thing This Month That Has No Productivity Value Whatsoever
Walk somewhere with no destination. Spend an afternoon making something you’ll eat and not photograph. Watch the snow (or, if you’re in the South, watch the idea of snow on someone else’s social media). The month is already full of obligations. Make room for purposeless pleasure.
3. Send a Card
An actual card. With a stamp. To someone who isn’t expecting one. The effort required is roughly twelve minutes, and the effect is disproportionately large.
4. Make Something By Hand for Someone
Even small things. A batch of cookies. A jar of something you put up in September. A playlist. A book you owned and loved and now want them to have. The making is the point. The recipient almost always understands this.
5. Choose Your Gatherings Carefully and Be Fully Present for Them
If you’re overscheduled, cut something. Fewer gatherings attended fully are worth more than many gatherings attended distractedly. The quality of your presence is the gift you bring.
December asks a lot. It doesn’t have to take everything.