If They Don’t Have Hot Sauce in Heaven Then I’m Probably in Hell

Richard's Food for Thought


I love to eat. When I die, I want eternal life to include home grown tomatoes, cucumbers, Neese’s Sausage and hot sauce. If it doesn’t, I’ll know I’ve gone to Hell.  (Is it wrong to want biscuits and gravy in eternity?) Food is important to me. If I’m going to eat, whether at home in a restaurant, I want to enjoy the experience. Who doesn’t? I choose my covered dish dinners by the churches and their resident cooks. Why go if you know they use inferior green beans and French onion soup mix?

So how do I best describe my culinary experiences? Over many years and countless meals, I’ve developed a complex system of responses to rate a meals and dining experiences. Granted, I’m not a professional food critic. I’m a redneck with refined tastes. Here’s my scale of rating meals:

1.  Not too bad. (translation: I’ve died and gone…

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